Have you already taken my quiz, “Find Your Personality Type and Its Life Purpose”? Then you already know your personality type and its core life purpose.
If you find ways to even partially express this aspect of yourself, you’ll have a solid foundation to stand upon. Your subconscious will be content, fueling you with the energy for new endeavors. Yet, when circumstances don’t allow you to gather resources or create a lack of acknowledgment from those around you, it can lead to self-esteem issues and subsequently affect your self-realization. Remember that your motivation to act is driven by dreams that seem accessible and attainable.
Experiencing feelings like “I don’t know what I want” or “I don’t know what to do” essentially translates to “I don’t know how to apply my abilities in my current situation.”
Why Do We Lose Our Inherent Focus?
For countless millennia, your ancestors lived in tight-knit groups where all natural roles was revered and respected. Kids learned from their parents and more experienced peers, gaining a clear sense of direction in every moment. The same way of life was repeated across generations, leaving little room for alternative approaches.
However, everything changed with the advent of trade and the shift to urban living. Suddenly, people were exposed to diverse routes to success, vastly different from their accustomed ways. Both parents and society at large began to impose new life trajectories upon children, not paying attention to the child’s aptitude.
The child would heed the guidance of relatives and educators, acting as instructed. Cities burgeoned, but this approach spawned countless discontented individuals. A quintessential example is the widespread alcoholism seen among factory workers during the period of industrialization. These were the Hunters who clocked in at factories, performing repetitive tasks day in and day out, with little opportunity for distinction or meaningful rewards. Their only recourse was drunk talks in bars. To feel significant, which is very important for Hunters, they had to suppress the objecting voice of their subconscious minds. Alcohol and drugs became the perfect coping mechanism.
Other People’s Dreams and Victories
Now, consider the extent to which our life trajectories are distorted due to modern pop culture. On-screen, we see individuals living in totally different environments and having access to different resources, yet we measure our success by their achievements. This happens because our subconscious has no idea that we live in the 21st century, therefore seeing ANY familiar individual as a fellow tribe member. If they treaded a specific path and attained success, our subconscious dictates that we should follow suit. Never mind that this person exists solely within the confines of a phone screen, and we know nothing about their actual life.
It’s crucial to bear in mind two fundamental principles:
- Retain the life purpose of your personality type. Not all tales of triumph are tailored to you.
- Remember what’s beneficial to you. Imitating individuals who have nothing to do with you or your circumstances leads to pointless frustration and the squandering your energy. Instead, channel your focus toward those who navigated situations akin to yours and managed to advance. Such experiences hold genuine value.
Defining Your Desires
Now, let’s see how we can formulate precise, attainable desires that lead to action.
If you have no idea what you want, instead of creating an action plan, choose to focus on the feelings you want to experience. In what situations would you feel fulfilled, strong, and capable? Your task involves placing yourself in circumstances that can evoke these emotions.
Then, assess what opportunities are available to you. What could potentially work? Conversely, what’s unsuitable?
Choosing What to Focus On
Now, let’s narrow down your focus and define what area of expertise sparks your interest. You don’t need to commit to a lifelong occupation just yet. Identifying one or several areas of interest is a great start.
Now answer the following questions:
• How do you spend your free time?
• What subjects do you enjoy reading about for your own enjoyment?
• What issues do you consider significant?
• Which professions or interests pique your curiosity?
• How would you like to be recognized in others’ contact lists? For instance, Mary (financial advisor), John (realtor), Kelly (author), etc.
Most importantly, your chosen area of expertise should align with the possibilities available to you.
Which field of activity seems viable in your current circumstances? Conversely, which options just don’t fit?
Examples: Relationships, Parenting, Business, Fashion, Beauty, Sports, History, Music, Politics, Psychology, Travel, Meditation, Cooking, Self-development, Marketing, Finance, Health, Fitness, Science, Technology, etc.
Once you’ve picked your field, it’s time to delve deeper. True satisfaction, a sense of purpose, and motivation emerge when people value your product or services and genuinely respect you. Being in demand comes from your ability to benefit others, which requires relevant knowledge and qualifications.
Initial Desires: Your Next Steps
Here’s what you should do next:
Step 1: Choose a core desire that resonates with your personality type and sparks the emotions you crave. For instance, “I want to achieve wealth, success, and a high self-esteem.”
Step 2: Apply this desire to your chosen field. Who within this area embodies the traits you’re seeking?
Step 3: Identify the knowledge and skills these individuals possess. What sets them apart? What do you need to learn? What can you start doing right now?
Your Productive Desire Formula:
“I want to experience ______________ (emotions), engaging in ______________ (type of work). To achieve this, I aim to acquire ______________ (skills) and gain expertise in __________________ (your chosen field).”
Too Many Interests
If a myriad of desires leaves you uncertain, choose one. Specifically, the one that unquestionably aligns with the emotions you wish to elicit. Remember, your decision isn’t set in stone, and you assume no risk by prioritizing it. Opting for a single desire frees up time, resources, and energy. Should the need arise, you can always revisit other aspirations. After all, you are the author of your life’s story—write it as you wish!
Lack of Desires
Should you find yourself having no desires at all, several possibilities come into play:
- Your well-being is already established, allowing you the luxury of contentment. Yes, it happens, and there’s no shame in it. If you’re already experiencing happiness, your subconscious finds itself utterly fulfilled and doesn’t waste your energy on new desires.
- Physical or mental constraints could be dampening your ability to dream of self-realization. Desires demand substantial energy, and if your physical or mental state is compromised, your subconscious won’t supply the vigor required. Make your first and most crucial desire to get your energy back. Begin by consulting a medical professional and/or psychologist.
- If you have no information regarding paths for self-realization, coupled with indecision about specific actions, this might be the issue. In this case, advice akin to “Listen to your heart” or “Follow your desires” won’t help. After all, if there’s nothing within your bag, you can’t possibly find car keys in it, right? The keys must first be placed inside.
Expanding your horizons will solve this problem. Start with a trip to a library or a sizable bookstore. Stroll through the aisles, acquainting yourself with diverse fields of knowledge. Take a look at the magazine section and pay specific attention to publications about something that you know nothing about. Magazines are a great source of recent ideas and news in various industries.
Don’t expect any “A-ha!” moments. Search for something that will spark your curiosity. Your task is to find something that looks important, inspiring, and accessible to you. Genuine interest arises when you start seeing a clear path to your personal achievements. You will recognize “your thing” when you learn what possibilities are out there.
Do You Want to Learn More Self-Realization Tips and Techniques?
Should you desire guidance in determining your next steps, feel free to reach out for a consultation. Within an hour, we’ll dissect your circumstances, engage in a brainstorming session, and outline a clear-cut action plan tailored to your specific needs.